Another Year

I took this project sort of like I did the Thank You project. I figured that since this year is a year of such big changes, where I'll start a new chapter of my life, it'd be appropriate to look back at my life so far. So I walked around my house, taking pictures of everything that reminded me of my life so far. So here it goes:

Thank you for that moment when I finally started learning street names

Thank you for the best chalkboards ever

Thank you for lessons from Papa

Thank you for my wiffle ball stadium

Thank you for homegrown apples, and how things that 

are broken on the outside, are amazing on the inside

Thank you for imagination, and Star Wars

Thank you for gardening, at least when it was fun for me

Thank you for the uniqueness of Christmas villages

Thank you for yellow mini tomatoes

Thank you for making things that used to seem so huge, not seem so big

Thank you for cool camera techniques

Thank you for Easter egg hunts

Thank you for photography

Thank you for ASB, and how close we've all become

Thank you for random partial skills I've learned

Thank you for You

Thank you for the unknown

Thank you for that really cool tall tree

Thank you for my home

Thank you for welcoming me

Thank you for flying

Thank you for my parents, and all they do for me

Thank you for adventures

Thank you for this next year, whatever it's like.

"No one can promise to continue feeling in a certain way"

     This statement is completely and totally true. We've (humanity) become so dependent and hopeful in our feelings, that we've come to believe that our feelings are the true judge of if we care, if we should do something, if we forgive, etc. We've even had the audacity to call love a feeling, a simple emotion, making it just as worthless as frustration or happiness, or any other emotion we feel.
     The church today, especially among youth just like me, is so attached and focused on those intimate  experiences with God, and the peaceful and joyful feelings that come with it. But we so often miss the point. We get stoked on these rad encounters with God, but then we just try to ride that feeling for as long as it'll last, feeling like we're close to God and completely set, not needing to do anything else. But then we hit that wall, the feelings leave and we burn out. We feel like God's forever away, and like we can't do anything without getting that feeling back. We equate that feeling with God. We idolize how God's presence makes us feel. And that's so messed up. God is not a feeling. Peace and joy and especially love, are not feelings. They're characteristics; fruits. Lewis nails it when He's talking about love. He says "being in love is a good thing, but it is not the best thing." He means that while feelings are great, and often times they help a lot, there's gotta be something more. And feelings are great, they're a good and perfect gift coming from God, just like everything else. But that's the point, they're from God, they point us to God, but they're not God.
    The first couple months I knew God, I struggled with this to the extreme, without even knowing it. I would only pray if I felt all stoked, because I felt like God didn't hear my prayers if I felt differently. I would "seek God" by reading my Bible or trying to be thankful, etc, just to get that feeling. Then I'd proceed to love people, or truly pray, or be thankful, etc. I thought that this feeling meant I was close to God, meant I was all set. But nothing could have been further from the truth. God wrecked my way of thinking. He showed me how much I was idolizing how I felt, and how much I didn't need to feel that way to know God. How how I feel doesn't dictate how passionately He loves me, and therefore shouldn't dictate how I live my life. We're called to act. To love people relentlessly. And love is something that gives up everything. It's easy to love someone when you feel all stoked. But true love isn't dependent on a feeling, it cares for people when the last thing you feel like doing is showing any sort of care to them at all. That's love. And the same goes for joy, and peace, and any other characteristic we're called to show. I know this will continue to be a challenge for me my whole life, but I take comfort in knowing that even when I feel stressed and sad, in God I can know joy and peace, and most importantly, love.